I lay awake and think of you

Looming close and over me

The dread, the pull, the fear

How not to give in to despair!


You come in weakness

You stay when I’m alone

You lurk within the dark

Leaving scars that mark


How I totally hate you

Despise you even more

Wish you a fiery end

No magic wand to amend


But that is not my reality

For you forever arrive

I can not walk around you

Meeting you is what I rue


What or who be you?

Don’t you yet know?

Its the future I fear

And it creeps ever near



Be there. Please. Be there.

In these moments of despair

Why are you not here?


I writhe in the agony of endless pain

Leaving me like this, what do you gain?


Where do you go when I am here alone?

No one to support me in my own home


I just need you so very, very much

Relying on you for such and such


Each little job feels a chore for you

But it’s something I NEED you to do


Hold me close and please, touch me now

In this moment while the pain will allow


For in a moment I might scream in pain

And cry bitterly underneath the strain


I wish we were normal, you and I

Not just me, upon you, I have to rely


Be there in the good times, not just the bad

So that we can celebrate, as well as feel sad


Together we stand, together we will fall

I wish it wasn’t on you for so much of it all