“In mindfulness, acceptance always comes first, change comes after”
I am still working on this quote and what it means in my life. I have a person in my life who enriches it in so many ways. Initially I fought hard against forming a strong attachment. I was convinced that he would hurt me or let me down, as many others had. I would struggle to define the friendship, and our roles in it. We would have some lovely “discussions” about being friends instead of enjoying that we were friends (okay I admit it, I argued he just nodded lol).
Eventually ( I can be a tad slow to learn) I stopped putting the expectations and pain of past friendships onto this new one. Essentially I accepted it as it was and as it evolved. With the acceptance of this friendship in the now – not based in the past or considered future issues – I have the opportunity to change it. But I don’t need to, he is simply accepted as my second brother. Chosen, rather than blood but no less loved.
The second example is the weekly weigh in. I had two weeks where I lost grams and I was getting frustrated because I was tracking and eating within my nutrition budget. This week I approached the weigh in with the attitude of accepting whatever the scales say. In doing this any loss was experienced in that moment and not clouded by past disappointments or future desires. It really helped (to be honest so did the 2.4 kilo loss!!)
Resources update: Shamash’s free 7 day mindfulness practice source
I am doing Shamash’s free 7 day mindfulness practice and really enjoying it. I will track down some of his books too. Mindfulness for dummies is especially appealing to me as I am only at the start of my journey with this style of living.
Thanks for reading! Comments very welcomed!!