Can’t Stand Me: What do you find more unbearable: watching a video of yourself, or listening to a recording of your voice? Why?
This is so easy to respond to:
What do you find more unbearable: watching a video of yourself,
or listening to a recording of your voice? Why?
All of the above!
If I have to prioritise the two I would go with the video because you can see more of me. I have a passionate hate of being seen, even by me. Plus it would feed my obsession with perfectionism, where I would keep watching, finding more and more faults and working on them until they were fixed. Of course, they may never be fixed so it would be an eternal fix – it job.
I did listen to my singing once. As a consequence, I felt an overwhelming sense of need to say sorry to the poor people that I had song to before. For in the mistaken belief that I could sing and whats worse should sing to other people! Hubby said I sounded like a dying cat but I thought he was teasing. In fact, he may have been too kind.
I think some of the problem is that I live a lot of my life online now. Only sharing myself through my writing. A video that can be watched or a tape that can be heard is too much like offline communication. I like the safety of being behind the words, shadowy and only known in part.