My brain has jumped on a discussion I had with my friend Andre and this is another poem derived in it.
Why do we have to fight for our lives and sanity?
Against the battering of mental illness & side effects
Against the definitions of society, that confine us
Against the stigma of a reality not of our making
Why is our greatest support those also suffering?
Where are those that could choose to understand?
But instead condemn and throw up barriers
Why are we outcasts because we do not hide away?
I am choosing to accept and leave the battlefield
I will not conform to society but nor will I rage against it
I choose to be me and others can just accept it
Or not, but their choice will not negate mine
I like imagining that I am the chessboard
I simply hold the forces of black and white
Equating to negative and positive positions
But I am neither side, I simply hold the forces
This seems to be the best position for me
Where I do not deny my mental illness,
Or hide the ways it has changed me
But I do not surrender my right to life
I now choose to live my life by my rules
I will not fight the effects of mental illness
But I will not let them dominate me either
I will be the woman experience created